If there are two things in the world that can bring a smile to our faces, they are babies and meat. So it seems only logical that we combine the two to create some type of super awesome, delicious hybrid: baby meat! Unfortunately there are laws and other stupid stuff that get in the way of making baby meat, so we made the next best thing - a meat baby.
Our grocery list included about 8 lbs ground beef, 2 lbs Italian sausage, bacon, onions, garlic, eggs and breadcrumbs. Here's how to conquer the meat baby:
1. Place all meat into giant container, in our case a big pot. Add 3-4 small chopped onions, 1-2 bulbs minced garlic, 6 eggs, breadcrumbs, salt, pepper and other spices to taste.
2. Realize that the gia
nt container is not nearly giant enough, dump all contents onto aluminum foil and mix thoroughly. Optional: get five dudes of questionable hygiene to perform that last step with their bare hands.
3. Joke around about making a giant meat penis (meanis), and then make one.
4. Disassemble penis against all objections and form arms, legs, torso and head. Place in oven at 375 F until thoroughly cooked. Note: Keep in mind different cooking times for different body parts.
Below are pictures of the fully assembled meat baby, the ensuing feast, and the aftermath.
Finished meat baby (yes, that is its wee-wee poking out of the bacon diaper)
From left: Laura, Daniel, Howie, Michelle, Shannon, Carol, Mike and Marcus
Meat baby with mashed potato hair and gravy bowl chest
After we had our way with the baby
Leftovers reassembled into terminator meat bear
Me and Shannon in meat coma on kitchen floor
Daniel, Howie, Mike and Shannon passing the eff out
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